Read the two paragraphs representing a first draft and a revision of a narrative about making a difficult choice.First Draft: I will never forget the day I got my dog at the animal shelter. I felt terrible for the dogs and cats behind the glass. I saw Bandit right away. He was a small brown and black terrier mix who came right to me as the shelter employee opened the door to his cage.Revision: I will never forget the day I rescued my dog from the animal shelter. My heart broke for the dogs and cats behind the glass. I spotted Bandit right away. He was a small brown and black terrier mix who bounded into my arms as the shelter volunteer released him from his cage.
Read the excerpt from “The Lottery.”"We're next." Mrs. Graves said. She watched while Mr. Graves came around from the side of the box, greeted Mr. Summers gravely and selected a slip of paper from the box. By now, all through the crowd there were men holding the small folded papers in their large hand, turning them over and over nervously Mrs. Dunbar and her two sons stood together, Mrs. Dunbar holding the slip of paper.
Read the sentence.My mom is my rock.
Read the paragraph.The day dawned gray and still, with dreary clouds that sat as guardians of the gloom. The dogs started to bark. She was here. With a deep sigh, I picked up my suitcase and headed out the door to my new foster home.
Second-person point of view features
Read the sentence.Compared to the rest of us, it took her two seconds to finish the test.
Read the excerpt from “The Lottery.”Soon the men began to gather, surveying their own children, speaking of planting and rain, tractors, and taxes.
Read the excerpt from “The Lottery.”Soon the men began to gather, surveying their own children, speaking of planting and rain, tractors and taxes. They stood together, away from the pile of stones in the corner, and their jokes were quiet and they smiled rather than laughed. The women, wearing faded house dresses and sweaters, came shortly after their menfolk. They greeted one another and exchanged bits of gossip as they went to join their husbands. Soon the women, standing by their husbands, began to call to their children, and the children came reluctantly, having to be called four or five times. Bobby Martin ducked under his mother's grasping hand and ran, laughing, back to the pile of stones. His father spoke up sharply, and Bobby came quickly and took his place between his father and his oldest brother.
How would “The Lottery” be different if told from Mr. Summers’ point of view?
Read the paragraph from a narrative.Entering the hallway, I inched by the hurling, squawking mass of kids. The sound was deafening as everyone reconnected from their summer apart. A million eyes on my back looked right through me. I was invisible.
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